Cat Food Hell !!!

OK, I know nobody reads my missives but I refuse to go all complacent. This is about cat food and honestly, cats should be pissed. I mean I thought dog food was a little dicey but cat food takes dreck to a whole new low. The fact that cats are not collectively refusing to use their litter boxes amazes me. Just how weak is their union?!?! Originally, I was going to put paw to computer and write a little editorial about how cats needed to get out more. That totally took a back seat when I managed to pull up some web-site (name escapes me at the moment) and took a look at the ingredients list for a dry cat food. My God it was horrible. Even if cats did get out more, which I think they should, they probably wouldn't have the energy to enjoy it. Everyone thinks cats are all imperious and aloof but the truth is they don't feel good. All this time and energy spent in making cats seem like defacto rulers of the universe is just a big cover-up for the fact that you feed your cats a big bowl full of crap each and every day. Have you taken 2 minutes out of your day to read an ingredients list? Have you? Really? I don't think so.

What is with you humans? We are supposed to be your best friends and, we don't ask for much but, decent food should be a given. The following is part of an ingredients list for a popular dry cat food. It is in order, starting with the very first ingredient. I did not skip anything but did not provide the whole list as my paws would have cramped up. Let's discuss: Poultry by-product meal, corn meal, corn gluten meal, ground whole wheat, brewer rice (probably left over from some third world brewery) soy flour, animal fat (notice they don't tell you what animal), fish meal, meat and bone meal (What kind of meat? 7 day old ground lizard probably.), brewers dried yeast, phosphoric acid (too cheap to use citric acid) and, drum roll please, ANIMAL DIGEST. Animal digest...I had to look that one up. Even with the definition in front of me I'm at a lose to tell you what animal digest actually is. I can tell you this, it's not pretty. And folks, this is what you're feeding your cat. Why, you idiots ask me, is this food bad for my cat? Well, let's discuss.

Cats are carnivores. On top of that, they are not really omnivorous like dogs. Dogs, I am here to testify, will eat most anything. Cats are pretty much solid carnivores. Now that you know what type of pet you have, take a look at the ingredients again. Notice the amount of grains and grain by-products listed. Carnivore people, C-A-R-N-I-V-O-R-E. Their bodies don't know what to do with so much grain in their diet. Honestly, I'm surprised they don't crap on your heads as you sleep. Even the very first ingredient is not meat, it's poultry by-broduct meal. Ugh! Cat's aren't imperious or demanding, they're just pissed off. I can't blame them. If John and Russell fed me cat food, aside from the obvious issues, I'd probably poop myself to death. But before I passed my last wood chip I'd go and pee on everything in their closet. It would be a total revenge piss. Stop feeding your cat crap. Take two (2) minutes and read a label. Then go visit Zane + Zara's pet boutique. You'll find food that will make for a happier cat. A happier, healthier cat is a much better companion. You might even get some kisses instead of that distant, dismissive stare that says, "your job is to fill the bowls and leave the room." I know I'm happier when I'm well fed. Now if they would start allowing me to use the silverware...